I wondered when I would finally feel better about Sammy's loss, and it did take about a year. Her anniversary on Oct. 13, 2008, was a very sad day, and I remember feeling awful that entire week. But with the holidays here, I realize that I can now look at her photo and talk about her without getting emotional. I will always adore, love and miss Sammy, but I am thankful that she suffered very little in her life. Her passing in two days was a complete and utter shock, and I grieved for a very long time. The holidays were awful without her, but I am fortunate that I had a very good support network of family and friends to help me get through it.
I also got to know myself better through this time, and realize that I did adopt Charli too soon. She was adopted exactly a month after Sammy died AND the very day after I returned from China. I don't sleep at all when I travel, and had jet lag for about two months. Seriously. I don't regret having Charli in my life, but know that next time I should consider fostering for a while before adopting again.
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